A perfect victim never fights back. I didn’t cut toxic people out of my life either. I just took it. Progress came when I encouraged my husband to find work in another state and move 1000 miles away. But my inner past came with me. I didn’t stand up for myself on anything. 22. “I…
I struggle with the fact that I suffer the consequences of another persons mistakes and evil choices. I get depressed thinking about what a mess my childhood was, most of my life I couldn’t even remember it. 21. “I have major issues with anxiety and depression because of my childhood. The biggest factor is…
*******Warning discussion of suicide******* I learned that I couldn’t continue watching the Star Wars series when they showed how Darth Vader came to be. If it feels too real, it is not entertainment. 17. “[I] won’t let anyone see the ‘bad’ side of myself.” https://themighty.com/2017/06/childhood-emotional-abuse-adult-habits/ I don’t want people to see the residual…
I felt like a complete dweeb when I started college. My parents made all my major decisions for me including what to study in college, where I went to college, and basically what I wore to college. Yup, I was controlled that completely. Teenagers don’t magically turn into decision making adults without making their own…
One of the main points of this blog is to share activities, changes, and thinking that have helped me cope with PTSD better after counseling than before. The huge division for me was BC before counseling and AC after counseling. There is a reason for this. Before counseling I didn’t know what was wrong with…
I believe that every person with PTSD or not had difficulties with relationships because we are human. We don’t see things the same way. We don’t respond to stress in the same way. We all have different expectations. However, PTSD and trauma can add layers of difficulty that can be difficult to cut through. Me…
The past 3 days I spoke to high school classes where I work about PTSD and coping skills. Fashion I discussed the dark side of fashion…anorexia, eating disorders, plastic surgery addiction, and other out of control behaviors trying to compete in a high stress, slave labor industry. I shared the coping skills I list here. …
I wrestled with cognitive dissonance but I didn’t know what it was or why it was sooooo uncomfortable. In counseling, I encountered extreme cognitive dissonance when my counselor tried to convince me I was a good person. Most people believe they are a good person. From the time I was small I was told repeatedly…
I am learning what the students at school are learning about computer programming. I believe if I learned programming this way in the first place, I wouldn’t have the anxiety I do now. I stopped taking computer classes when I felt sick at the thought of taking another one. Code.org is free. The 2 minute…
This is a forever lament for those in the healing process. Why didn’t I get counseling years ago? Why didn’t I get away from that abuser years ago? Why? Why? Why? I found a quote that I believe encapsulates why. “At first people refuse to believe that a strange new thing can be done, then…
PTSD - Accepting, Coping, Thriving 