Self-abuse

One of the confusing things that my counselor spent many hours trying to help me understand was I needed to fire my mean boss.   That mean boss that expects me to arrive early and leave late.  The one that doesn’t allow any sick time.  Punishes me for not doing enough.  Rages at me for the…

Cognitive dissonance at work

Today I had an excellent example of cognitive dissonance.  A friend of my mother’s made the mistake of complaining to my husband about my mother not being brought home.  (My mother is currently in a care center for dementia.)  DH told her he was sick and tired of my mother emotionally abusing me and yelling…

Sharing

The past 3 days I spoke to high school classes where I work about PTSD and coping skills.  Fashion I discussed the dark side of fashion…anorexia, eating disorders, plastic surgery addiction, and other out of control behaviors trying to compete in a high stress, slave labor industry.  I shared the coping skills I list here. …

No Celebration

This post is mostly for those with CPTSD.  Complex PTSD often, but not always, steeped in childhood abuse.  Sadly, one of the worst abusers can be your own mother.  Even more confusing is when that mother is sweet and wonderful to everyone except their targeted child.  Becomes even more confusing when some of the children…

Body memories

  Awareness of childhood sexual abuse “We only believe those thoughts which have been conceived not in the brain but in the whole body” – W.B. Yeats * The process triggered by working with the brain and the body in conjunction deepen cognitive development significantly in the areas of evaluating, analyzing, applying and remembering *…

Reminder I survived

Thanks to Facebook I connected with Lilly Hope Lucario – Link below if you would like to connect too.  Her post encourage me and remind me there are many others struggling with CPTSD*. Healing From Complex Trauma and Ptsd/cptsd November 22, 2016 · I would like to say something to all complex trauma survivors…. We…

Burden lifted

I ponder and wonder about things that happen in life.  I carried with me a terrible burden that my mother threatened suicide when I was a teenager because I wasn’t doing enough to help her.  Yet she resented everything I did to help her.  I carried this terrible secret and burden for years.  Last night…