Self-care vs Selfish

***********Trigger warning*************  written specifically for those with a strong Christian background.   I was taught methodically and purposefully to neglect myself, to serve others, and self-care was being selfish.  Lies upon lies.  Martyrs come in all shapes and sizes.  Putting a cause, others, and anything else before yourself is foolish at best and down right…

Change hyper-vigilance

To something deeper, discernment. I follow Lilly Hope Lucario on Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD A journey to healing from complex trauma.  The article I read is about turning hyper-vigilance into discernment. This is her link:  https://healingfromcomplextraumaandptsd.wordpress.com/2016/09/11/turning-hypervigilance-into-discernment-is-healing-lilly-hope-lucario/ For many people this is a sticky area because discernment has to do with judgement. http://www.thefreedictionary.com/discernment dis·cern·ment (dĭ-sûrn′mənt)…

Perfect victim

A perfect victim never fights back.  I didn’t cut toxic people out of my life either.  I just took it.  Progress came when I encouraged my husband to find work in another state and move 1000 miles away.  But my inner past came with me.  I didn’t stand up for myself on anything. 22. “I…

Different Facets

Of the same problem….Trust. 14. “I avoid asking help from anyone because I don’t trust anyone. I believe if someone offers me a hand, there will always be something they [want to] ask in return. I have friends but I don’t have a best friend. I keep my distance from people. Automatically, my wall blocks…

Capital letters

I know all caps is shouting on line but this next behavior would be all capitals. “I have trouble accepting any kind of love because growing up, it was always given with strings attached or used a tool for manipulation. I don’t trust that others have the capacity to love me unconditionally, so I hide…