Self-compassion

Learning Self-compassion is a long term goal. I can actually say I made improvements.  I am grieving a huge loss, instead of beating myself up for not moving mountains and working as if nothing happened, I am giving myself time each day to feel sad.  I cry when I need to.  I am not expecting…

Spending Therapy or

Self-care.  Hard to sort this out when I am trying to take care of myself or am I spending money not to really help myself but to have fun spending money or am I just a muddled mess when it comes to money. 15. Spending money on things for myself, getting haircuts and pedicures, making…

Self-care, Are you?

What?  I am supposed to self-care?  Don’t I have enough to do caring for everyone else? https://healingfromcomplextraumaandptsd.wordpress.com/2017/07/16/25-obvious-non-obvious-self-care-issues-complex-trauma-survivors-struggle-with-lilly-hope-lucario/   Judy, my sister, found this link and shared it on her project/blog. Last round of 25 things my sister wrote after I did.  This time I think I will reverse it and post the link to her…

Self-abuse

One of the confusing things that my counselor spent many hours trying to help me understand was I needed to fire my mean boss.   That mean boss that expects me to arrive early and leave late.  The one that doesn’t allow any sick time.  Punishes me for not doing enough.  Rages at me for the…

Negative Tape

My counselor commented that the things I say to myself are some of the worse things I’ve ever heard all compacted onto one short ugly tape, played every time I make a human mistake.  He pointed out that I would never say to someone else what I say to myself…. In Pavelka’s toolbox he called…

Calming myself (part 1)

A post on Facebook led to a link to an article with 49 phrases to use to calm an anxious child.  I am going to explain how these can be used to calm an anxious adult, especially yourself:  (My inner child needed lots of calming, especially when I was in counseling and remembering my past.) …