My daughter posted a link to a list of hidden forms of abuse. Those behaviors that fall in the category of deniable. The abuser turns things around and blames the victim. https://tapoos.com/relationships/9-abusive-behaviors-not-physical/?utm_source=virmed&utm_medium=affiliate&utm_campaign=VMPub146 Gaslighting – This is an intentional war on the mind and emotions of another person. It is coined from a movie from the…
I grew up with no social media. I couldn’t text, surf or blog because none of that existed. Saved me from posting a lot of dumb stuff. 25. “Several things, but the main one was lashing out on social media for years. Controversial and angry statuses, just due to the anger inside of me. I…
************* TRIGGER WARNING************* I asked this question in high school. I took a class called search for identity. We read the book Daphne du Maurier The Scapegoat. https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/18869971-the-scapegoat Left me with more questions than answers. I was the only person in the class that read the semester long text in two weeks. The…
I struggle with the fact that I suffer the consequences of another persons mistakes and evil choices. I get depressed thinking about what a mess my childhood was, most of my life I couldn’t even remember it. 21. “I have major issues with anxiety and depression because of my childhood. The biggest factor is…
I’m combining these next two things that I did. This was a monster hurdle because everyone loves someone that does everything for them, right? Yup, lots of rewards but sometimes at a terrible cost. The cost of myself, my relationships, my dreams, my needs didn’t exist. 12. “I feel the need to please everybody I…
One of the main points of this blog is to share activities, changes, and thinking that have helped me cope with PTSD better after counseling than before. The huge division for me was BC before counseling and AC after counseling. There is a reason for this. Before counseling I didn’t know what was wrong with…
Sometimes a post fits on both pages. This is one of those posts. http://weareone-ruth.blogspot.com/2017/06/survival-tool-but.html Survival tool but….not a living tool. People pleasing is how I survived the insanity of growing up in a home with a demanding mother. By jumping through her hoops I got fed and fewer spankings. However, People pleasing has a…
I maintain two different blogs. One is my personal journey out of the darkness of abuse survival. The second is this one about PTSD. Every so often I write a post that fits both places. Today is one of those posts. http://weareone-ruth.blogspot.com/2017/05/crap-happens.html Today I talked to the fashion students. I explained why I didn’t go…
I wrestled with cognitive dissonance but I didn’t know what it was or why it was sooooo uncomfortable. In counseling, I encountered extreme cognitive dissonance when my counselor tried to convince me I was a good person. Most people believe they are a good person. From the time I was small I was told repeatedly…
This is a forever lament for those in the healing process. Why didn’t I get counseling years ago? Why didn’t I get away from that abuser years ago? Why? Why? Why? I found a quote that I believe encapsulates why. “At first people refuse to believe that a strange new thing can be done, then…
PTSD - Accepting, Coping, Thriving 