My PTSD is Worse than yours……

Warning warning Rant ahead……if you are triggered by ranting back away now.  I’m Pissed for a reason and it has to do with People posting about someone else having PTSD or NOT. 

so you don’t have it.

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?  Yes, I read just this attitude on one of the posts on Facebook.  I’ve encountered it myself….well your abuse wasn’t THAT bad so how can you have PTSD?  News flash people….this reminds me having someone declaring to a stage 2 cancer person that they don’t really have cancer since their cancer isn’t stage 4 cancer.  AAAAAHHHHHHGGGGGGGGGGG!  I am going to say this with very small words “PTSD sucks.”  How you got it doesn’t matter to anyone accept the person processing it.  My abuse is my abuse.  The worse thing that ever happened to me is the worse thing that ever happened to me.  It certainly doesn’t help to have someone else diminish my experience because they believe their experience is more horrific than mine.  Believe me, you do not want to play “Can you top this” with me.  And I am not the worse abuse case out there, not by a long shot.  People do incredibly cruel things to each other.  We certainly don’t need to be in a pissing match to see who got screwed up the most.  If you are still reading this, please, understand that here people are looking for answers to be healthier.  PTSD is ultimate survival but wearing full body armor to the beach makes the experience less fun.  After years of counseling, I still have symptoms of PTSD.  However, after years of counseling PTSD does not run my life.  I believe that PTSD works on a continuum.  There are people that talk about no longer having PTSD and going on with their life.  I am thrilled for them.  It didn’t work out that way for me.  I am happier than I have ever been but last week I flinched when someone brushed against me unexpectedly.  I am certainly doing much better than I did 20 years ago when I still believed I had a medical ‘condition’.  PTSD stomped me into the ground before I was diagnosed and taught new ways of functioning.  There is no need to compare abuse/trauma/sucky experiences.  Sharing ideas on how to face the past with courage and understanding….that is useful.  Comparisons never do any good for anyone.  Besides, the darkest secrets are often left untold.  Healing path is a journey, trying to knock each other down is playing right into the abuser’s hand.  We can help each other most by accepting where ever we are right now.  I am thankful for a counselor that helped me understand what kind of mess I was in but promised me that if I was willing to work, I didn’t need to stay there.  I was blessed with the first counselor.  My PTSD is not as bad as it used to be and the only comparison I am doing is with myself in my own progress.  I measure my progress in years because day-to-day I feel like a snail could race past me.  Rant over.  Tomorrow’s post should be back with more ideas on how to cope and thrive.

RM5_0187Home Sweet Home

 

 

 

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3 thoughts on “My PTSD is Worse than yours……

  1. Most often, I find that all of the things that have needed to be said, and in just the right way, only come out when we are pissed. Rant and post…no need to edit or reword anything. It’s perfect in its entirety 🙂 Go RUTH!!

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