This one is needed after the last one. https://ptsd-acceptingcopingthriving.com/2016/09/03/still-in-it/ Should you decide to use the word no and stop taking personally all the words they spew out, they will call in the flying monkeys. Friends, family, acquaintances get dragged in to take their side. They will twist every event into some horrible thing you have done. This is a link to the original article: http://markofbeasttheimagenameandnumber.blogspot.com/2011/11/triangulation-devils-triangle.html This is the link to Jonsi’s perspective: http://jonsi-jonsi.blogspot.com/2013/03/triangulation-explained.html
I know it is a lot of reading. However, if you are attacked by flying monkeys, knowledge is power. Recently someone tried to enlist me as their flying monkey. I listened to what they had to say but I knew I was listening to someone trying to manipulate me to do their bidding. I politely declined the offer and warned the person that was being triangulated. It is sad when bosses, parents, siblings, friends and others resort to these behaviors to get their way. Kindness, empathy, seeing other person’s perspective, respect, honoring boundaries, the whole love one another thing works.