I wanted to give encouragement after the suicide posts. But I don’t want to make it sound off the cuff like “Just stop it” or some other cliche. Survival of suicidal thoughts takes DETERMINATION. My friend has severe arthritis and her son took a picture of her struggling to sweep the floor because she wanted it done. I saw it and thought that is the key element to surviving suicidal thoughts. Determining why you want to live and sticking to it. My sister calls it, “David Goggings it.” If you want to know who he is https://davidgoggins.com/about/ Don’t expect nice and comforting from him. Not his style. He determines what he is going to do and does it come hell or high water.
Find your why to live. Your children, your pet, your job, your faith in God, your whatever it takes. My why was ‘if I took my own life, the pedophile wins.’ I was not going to let him win. My therapist confirmed that those that survive suicidal thoughts are the ones that find a reason to live. What that reason is doesn’t matter, what does matter is a person’s determination. I wake up in the morning, I move, I hurt, I’m not dead yet GET UP. Some days it takes ever ounce of determination I have to get up but I get up. Most days I get up and go to work. If you are sitting here reading this message right now, you have determination. You got up and you are reading some old lady’s words on how to turn survival into thriving. You have determination. I think determination is getting a bad wrap these days. It is not taught in school but it is taught on the sports playing field. You can’t go out and buy an ounce of determination. You build it drop by drop every time you take the smallest baby step forward, whatever that looks like to you. Falling down is not quitting. Taking a rest is not quitting. I rested for about 3 years but dog gone I did not quit. Some days my moving forward looks more like falling flat on my face. But that is moving forward. My counselor actually seemed in awe of my determination to heal. He watched as I poured out my pain each week and came back to do it again and again because I was determined to get the pain out so there was room for growth. I did not give up. Hugs to everyone that got up this morning. You are amazing. Your determination will see you through when things like happy thoughts fail.
Grit is another name for it. It ain’t pretty nor comfortable nor wishy washy. It is mud in the face get up and go on sore feet and painful body. It is rejecting an abusers opinion of who you are and sticking to your goal. It is a Can Do Attitude.
Grit in psychology is a positive, non-cognitive trait based on an individual’s perseverance of effort combined with the passion for a particular long-term goal or end state (a powerful motivation to achieve an objective).
Grit (personality trait) – Wikipedia
When you feel like you have nothing left to give – keep going.