Last week end I took a trip with my daughter.  In the past, she did all the driving while I chatted with the kids, crocheted or slept.  This time she felt sick.  Our choices were go home or I drive.  I chose to drive.  I hit a record of driving almost 8 hours.  I haven’t driven more that an hour in over 30 years.  It felt good.  Driving home I again drove about half the distance.  It was a milestone for me that in my mind underlined the huge improvement in my health.

Today however reminded me that I am not “better” just good days more often than not.  Today was a rough day.  I had two major challenges: subbing in a class and a bully in the library.  I was bullied most of my childhood so this was a major hot button.  The rush of adrenaline and the subsequent reactions challenged myself control.  I am not regretting how I handled the situation but I am just so darn mad that I am put in this situation in the first place.  I feel like what they are asking me to do is along the lines of security but I do not get paid to do security type work.  Nothing I am doing during lunch duty is in my job description.  Plus there are 5 other adults in the room and most of them seem to just not care about what students are doing. Today after work I came in the door and crashed out on the couch.  Sleeping for hours then waking up feeling worse than when I went to sleep.  These kinds of naps are not restful.  More like comatose and waking up feeling like I am part of the Zombie Apocalypse.  Now I am too awake to go to sleep when I should be sleeping.  Heavy sigh…this is a win some – lose some week.

On the road again….