Living in fear

Living is fear is not new to me.  My counselor pointed out I lived a fear based life.  My childhood revolved around jumping through ever changing hoops to avoid some punishment.  Then there were the weirdness of some punishments I preferred.  If I complained about eating a meal with bell pepper in it, I would…

Skills to learn

Early in my counseling my therapist bluntly told me I was an emotional moron.  Wow thanks.  But he followed this with the information that I can change this by learning the skills that I didn’t learning as a child.  I totally did not comprehend how much I missed out on growing up.  I didn’t grow…

Another shift

My son-in-law teaches people about how to shift their paradigm….I’ve read along and nodded my head; then it struck me, I need another paradigm shift.  For those not familiar with paradigm, it is the thoughts, beliefs, and behaviors that we live by.  Many of these beliefs and behaviors started in childhood.  If you had a…

Can’t Make Him Happy

I belong to 2 CPTSD/PTSD groups on Facebook.  I don’t remember which one posted the question but a woman asked how she could help her little girl be happy again because they were going on a mother/daughter trip and the daddy said he would be sad while they were gone.  The little tender hearted girl…

Change your Focus

I was miserable last night.  We went with our grandkids to a carnival with flashing lights, loud music and junk food.  The kids enjoyed themselves immensely.  I asked my daughter with TBI how she was coping with all that was going on.  She pointed out her baseball type hat that shielded her eyes from most…

Quitting and Pausing

Last post was a list of things to quit.  Part of changing to healthier ways of living is quitting old bad habits that no longer fit into our growing life style.  However, not quitting healing is an important journey.  I am thankful that my first counselor understood how much work there is in healing past…

Time of reflection

This month started out with a bang, DH went to the emergency room…..very rare occurrence..our children kept asking if it was me instead.  Turns out he is now on temporary disability and a lot of pain.  Thankful to a lady from church that provided some relief and pain management tools.  Followed by my mother dying. …

Paring down the to do list

Our lives had a new twist added that is extremely unpleasant.  I decided to pare down and cut out many things on my to do list.  I decided that some things will just be missed this year.  I am focusing on gifts for grandkids.  Already shipped the ones out of state.  I learned years ago…