Early in my counseling my therapist bluntly told me I was an emotional moron. Wow thanks. But he followed this with the information that I can change this by learning the skills that I didn’t learning as a child. I totally did not comprehend how much I missed out on growing up. I didn’t grow up, I survived. Any signs of possibly growing up were immediately squashed. I was squashed over and over. My therapist pointed out that I needed to go through all the stages I missed. One thing after another became topics to pick apart and explore how to integrate them into my life. I described this process similar to changing my car engine while I drove down the freeway. Recently my daughter posted a link to a site that lists a few of the things to learn about living.
This article starts out defining Emotional Intelligence. I tried reading a book on it but gave up because I felt so overwhelmed with what I didn’t know. I may try the book again at a later date. The main points of emotional intelligence include but are not limited to self-awareness, self-regulation, motivation, empathy and socialization. Each one of the these could be an extensive program of study but the article share definitions in a few lines. Then the article list several different social situations. I would call this article something to raise awareness that these are skills. I often felt that some people could do these things and I couldn’t. My counselor taught me with many homework assignments to do some of these. I joined Toast Masters to help me over come my fear of talking to people in groups. That only lasted a few months but really helped. I continue on my journey of learning and trying new things that were barred to me in childhood. My inner critic still nags me but I learned that my inner critic was the tape placed there by my abusers and best ignored. I believe this article is a starting of a To-do list for thriving. My therapist helped me a bunch. Now I continue my own journey, learning and growing which by definition is thriving. I love thriving.