Back to Basics

I was doing really great at the beginning of this year, at least I thought so. Then Covid locked downs hit. My job went from classroom to practically nothing, but fortunately still employed. I still thought I was doing ok. Not impressed with the World reaction to another flu, but I was coping. Then after…

Not for the Faint of heart

Stay home they said….you won’t get sick they said……I refuse to listen to any more of their “Do this or that” propaganda.  More political than healthy.  To keep myself occupied at home I tried to do things to help my teachers but didn’t have much to do from home.  Time on my hands.  For years,…

Name that emotion

One of the challenges I experienced was dissociation.  I separated myself so completely from my emotions that I could not name what I felt at any given time.  Much of the time I felt gray…..I spent months taking pictures of gray trying to find the one the exemplified how I felt. After hundreds and hundreds…

Hazards of Hyper-Focus

Are you one of those people that can focus so completely that the whole house could burn down while reading a book?  Or focused on the task at hand someone speaks to you and you jump out of your skin?  Or how about working so focused that the janitor locking up wonders why you are…

Healing is a Choice

I am writing several posts about acceptance…accepting myself, my diagnosis, my challenges.  Along the way I noticed in my reading about acceptance that some people interpret acceptance as staying the way they are.  I don’t believe this.  I accept where I am but that doesn’t mean I plan to stay that way.  I believe strongly…

Accepting my body

I grew up kind of on the small size but I weighed as much as my older brother.  Instead of looking into why my older brother was small I was lectured from age nine about losing weight.  They didn’t compare me to other kids in my class.  I was one of the smallest….but the lectures…

Not good enough

Caution Rant post……     People say, “Stop apologizing all the time.”  But then they tell you what is wrong with you and expect an apology.  People say, “You are enough.”  Then they tell you how much you hurt other people and you are not enough.  People say, “Accept me how I am.”  But refuse…

Body memories

  Awareness of childhood sexual abuse “We only believe those thoughts which have been conceived not in the brain but in the whole body” – W.B. Yeats * The process triggered by working with the brain and the body in conjunction deepen cognitive development significantly in the areas of evaluating, analyzing, applying and remembering *…

Does it ever end?

Some people online are crying, “Does PTSD ever end?”  They feel frustrated, hurt, and isolated.  I don’t know if it ever ends.  I’ve had it since I was 5 years old, I will turn 59 next month.  I control it much better after years of counseling.  I may have many good days in a row. …