Self forgiveness

Months ago, I read this article on self-care, then I immersed myself in a huge costume project that self care came so far down the list I was down right mean to myself.  I focused on finishing, DH(darling husband) made sure I ate and sewed for me when others decided the project was too big…

Science of Thriving

My counselor told me early on that his goal for me was to not just survive but to thrive.  Rah Rah Great….The next week I came back and asked, “What is thriving?”  At first he seemed to think I was jerking his chain then he realized I didn’t know what he meant, for real.  He…

Self-care vs Selfish

***********Trigger warning*************  written specifically for those with a strong Christian background.   I was taught methodically and purposefully to neglect myself, to serve others, and self-care was being selfish.  Lies upon lies.  Martyrs come in all shapes and sizes.  Putting a cause, others, and anything else before yourself is foolish at best and down right…

Woes of People Pleasing

I’m combining these next two things that I did.  This was a monster hurdle because everyone loves someone that does everything for them, right?  Yup, lots of rewards but sometimes at a terrible cost.  The cost of myself, my relationships, my dreams, my needs didn’t exist. 12. “I feel the need to please everybody I…

Capital letters

I know all caps is shouting on line but this next behavior would be all capitals. “I have trouble accepting any kind of love because growing up, it was always given with strings attached or used a tool for manipulation. I don’t trust that others have the capacity to love me unconditionally, so I hide…

Quotes to confuse

I like reading inspirational quotes….if you pick the right quotes….life gets confusing. http://www.curejoy.com/content/11-inspiring-quotes-will-give-needed-push-life/ If you don’t like how things are, change it! You’re not a tree. Jim Rohn Read more at: https://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/j/jimrohn147488.html Bloom Where you are Planted…   Look twice before you leap. Charlotte Bronte Read more at: https://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/c/charlotteb131925.html You can’t get anywhere in life…

Illogical solution

How can I help? When I am totally overwhelmed, it is illogical to serve someone else.  However, one of life’s paradoxes is helping others helps me feel less overwhelmed.  I tested it repeatedly and it works.  It is more fun to do dishes at my kids house than at my own house.  My heart feels…

Being less

One of the difficult concepts to overcome is the belief that I am less; less important, less smart, less pretty, less loved.  In a family with favorites, I was informed multiple times that I would be given less food, less attention, less time, less money because others in the family were more important than I…

I believe you

My world stopped then started unwinding when my counselor told me these words.  I was told I was lying from the time I was very small until I thought it was true.  However, my counselor changed all that.  He believed me.  He listened to me.  He reminded me I was worth rescuing.  I’m thankful I…