Life Changing Experiences

Life changing experiences should change your life.  I am seeing a disturbing trend among PTSD support groups on Facebook.  There is a cry of ‘I don’t want this to change me.’  Frankly, I think it is very disturbing if you are not affected by a life changing experience.  September of 2001 I was diagnosed with breast cancer.  I was stunned beyond words.  I came home and the first time I said, “I have cancer.” I passed out.  I was terrified and completely consumed by fear and horror of having cancer.  Then September 11, 2001 happened.  I stood in the computer lab where I worked with every monitor tuned to the mounting horror as one plane after another crashed into the ground, the Pentagon, and the Twin Towers.  I was numb.  Staring at the carnage.  I barely registered what I was seeing.  So much to take in.  I didn’t close the labs.  I remained open all day to anyone wanting to log in and see the news.  The groups huddled around one news story or another.  The monitor repeating over and over the horrific scenes.  The following Saturday I climbed my favorite mountain and sat by my shot up cactus and cried and cried.  I knew like the cactus I would be scarred but I also knew I had 90% chance for survival.  The scar on my chest reminds me every day I survive horrific things, thousands of others did not.  September 11 made cancer doable.  It forever shifted the World and my beliefs.  I believe it would be a tragedy if life simply went on as if nothing happened.

 

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