Worry is a Bully

Late at night, I know I should be trying to sleep and I am watching a rerun of NCIS.  It is the episode that Gibbs persuades Timothy that after an ordeal he should seek counseling.  The counselor listens to Timothy’s concerns then states, “Worry is a bully.”  It was like a huge light bulb moment. …

Independence a State of Mind

How many of us feel tied to our jobs, families, past or other anchors or bricks in our lives?  The United States declared their Independence from England.  Unheard of.  How strange!  England ruled the World…..the sun never set on their Empire.  The Upstarts that wrote out and established their Independence changed the World in a…

Live like you’ll die tomorrow

Is the worse advice.  They imply that you should live each day to the fullest because tomorrow you might die.  Perhaps.  Too many take this advice then they don’t die and have no plans for their own future.  When I was 16 I didn’t believe I would live to see 18.  I lived moment by…

Boiling Water

Some themes, poems, stories and experiences stick with me, mulling them over and over.  I take them out and reread them and consider their import….why do I keep thinking about some of these?  One such story is The Potato, the egg and Hot chocolate (I like it better than coffee in the original story.) Story…

The person with the problem

My counselor was a bit of a maverick.  Every year I signed a paper saying that his counseling was not conventional and I was fully aware that he went off the beaten path of “accepted therapy.”  I’m so glad he did.  He approached my issues totally different than the other people I knew that visited…

In Search of Happiness

One definition of thriving is feeling Happy.  Living through deep depression, PTSD or some people call it CPTSD, cancer, and suicidal ideology, happiness seemed elusive or fleeting.  Years ago a lady I knew wrote a song about Happiness is Like a butterfly….When pursued is frightened and shied.  I lived hearing things like when you get…

Practice What I Preach

For weeks, I’ve written about the importance of self-care.  Now it is time for me to practice what I preach.  Deep sadness came to our family when our little granddaughter lived less than an hour.  We knew ahead of time.  I tried to prepare.  I underestimated the impact of one tiny little girl.  We said…

Permission to feel

Interesting how Lilly needs to write again about feeling all feelings including peaceful ones.  For me I needed permission to feel angry, sad, and all the ‘negative’ emotions.  Without the ‘negative’ emotions, I did not recognize feeling peace when it did come.  It got smothered along with all the other emotions.  My first counselor recognized…

Mind over Matter

If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.  Seriously, I learned this doing dishes. 16. Not feeling like I’m a bad mom/housekeeper etc while I struggle with chronic pain and health issues. https://healingfromcomplextraumaandptsd.wordpress.com/2017/07/16/25-obvious-non-obvious-self-care-issues-complex-trauma-survivors-struggle-with-lilly-hope-lucario/ Judy shares her views on self-care challenge #16: https://theprojectbyjudy.wordpress.com/2017/11/30/self-care-16-of-25/ My health problems started when I was 15 years old.  I passed out at…

Eat your Vegetables

Self-care #7loaded with triggers for me. 7. Preparing and eating healthy meals. I know how to, I know I deserve it, I can plan it and even sometimes manage to buy the groceries, but I freeze when it comes to the “doing” which doesn’t even bring me to “the eating”. https://healingfromcomplextraumaandptsd.wordpress.com/2017/07/16/25-obvious-non-obvious-self-care-issues-complex-trauma-survivors-struggle-with-lilly-hope-lucario/ Judy’s perspective is linked…