Still

I was looking for the author of the poem that I posted on my other blog.  http://weareone-ruth.blogspot.com/2018/05/healing-is-messy.html The poem appealed to me because I felt like there was someone else besides me that seems to think it is OK to be messy while we heal and that after healing life is still messy.   So…

Emotional Mindfulness

The title to this article intrigued me: Emotional Mindfulness: What Anger, Vulnerability & Despair Teach Us Emotional Mindfulness: What Anger, Vulnerability & Despair Teach Us I enjoy coming across an article that agrees with me.  I spent a large portion of my life unable to access how I felt.  Through brutal childhood experience I learned to separate…

In Search of Happiness

One definition of thriving is feeling Happy.  Living through deep depression, PTSD or some people call it CPTSD, cancer, and suicidal ideology, happiness seemed elusive or fleeting.  Years ago a lady I knew wrote a song about Happiness is Like a butterfly….When pursued is frightened and shied.  I lived hearing things like when you get…

Science of Thriving

My counselor told me early on that his goal for me was to not just survive but to thrive.  Rah Rah Great….The next week I came back and asked, “What is thriving?”  At first he seemed to think I was jerking his chain then he realized I didn’t know what he meant, for real.  He…

Connecting to feelings

I was asked how did I reconnect to my feelings…….This is my response. My counselor worked with me for years but there are a few basics that made a big difference. Rule #1 Stop lying, especially to yourself. Emotions are messy and temporary. Ignoring them, they will go away taking happiness, contentment and joy with…

Similar frustration

My friend posted an article about cancer patients that are bombarded with ‘easy answers’ and ‘insensitive advice’.  Steven Thrasher the author shared his sister’s experience with cancer.  https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2016/mar/26/do-not-tell-cancer-patients-cures-they-could-be-doing She fought for 15 years before the cancer beat her.  He shares how people advised her to drink juice, do yoga, be cheerful and many other less…

Feeling left out

I wanted to write an article with references about PTSD/CPTSD and relationships.  Bless my husband for sticking with me through a rollercoaster of experiences and counseling.  I want to share tips and ideas plus share resources to back up what I am writing.  Frustration is finding articles that don’t talk about before and after trauma. …

It’s all in your head

Because your brain is there. Research shows how the brain functions with memories and emotions.  I learned terms like amygdala hijacking, limbic system, and other parts of the brain.  I learned that smell cuts right to the center of the brain so produces the most powerful PTSD response.  Yes, there are times I look up…

Tears of loss

I started counseling over 15 years ago.  At the time, I told my counselor I could count on one hand how many times I had cried, then I named them.  He taught me that crying was an expression of deep emotion and was good for releasing pent up feelings.  I was ridiculed as a child…

Happiness is a choice Sort of

I’ve heard it all my life that happiness is a choice, sort of.  What I couldn’t keep up was the demand that I be happy constantly and any time I was less than happy I was flawed, needed fixing, or needed to snap out of it.  I am happy, sad, funny, weird, crying, excited, and…