I was looking for the author of the poem that I posted on my other blog. http://weareone-ruth.blogspot.com/2018/05/healing-is-messy.html The poem appealed to me because I felt like there was someone else besides me that seems to think it is OK to be messy while we heal and that after healing life is still messy. So I was looking to see if anyone laid claim to the poem and I found this video. Jeff Foster titles the video Deepest acceptance. I am startled when I encounter someone else that is saying what I am believing. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cRLKZN1LRFM Less than 10 minutes it says that sadness still being part of life after healing is acceptable. As mother day creeps up each year I become a morass of sadness and longing and regret and joy. It is like I am a train wreck for a week. I’m sad that I do not have a relationship with my mother. I long for something I can not have. I regret the mistakes I made as a mother. I feel intense joy by my amazing children, their spouses, and grandchildren. I feel like Jeff is telling me the lie is that I should be over my feelings. He states that my heart still feels these things I no longer need to beat myself up because I still feel sad, longing, regret and joy. My second counselor also discussed sitting and holding emotions when they come into my life. Distress comes when I push away, deny, and bury my emotions. My job in my mind is not to be overwhelmed by what I feel and I agree that it is ironic that holding emotions is what helps in the healing process. I’m planning to view a few more of his videos. A perspective I agree with and hadn’t found expressed so openly by someone else, until now.