Cry Alone

PTSD symptoms vary.  One of the ones I didn’t show at first was crying.  Many survivors talk about the flood of tears that just kept coming.  At one point I didn’t think I had any depression because I didn’t cry.  I finally checked out a book from the library about depression and realized I had…

The ‘I’ Statement

I believe this is one of the most powerful tools I was ever blessed with.  Thank you first counselor.  He taught me the power of the ‘I’.  I came to his office complaining, “He did that…..” “She did this……”  I didn’t understand that as long as I phrased all my thinking in what the other…

Emotional Blackouts

Another name for numbing, dissociation, loosing heart, deep depression, void…..similar to physical pain a person can only take so much emotional pain than the emotional heart shuts down.  One of the distressful symptoms of PTSD is this emotional shutting down.  The mind still works.  I felt aware of other people I just felt so shutout…

Fun Fun Fun

I work at a high school.  The end of the school year is in 2 weeks.  At our school, we encourage learning through doing.  Projects, huge projects, our students put on a fashion show last night.  The Saturday before about 400 students showed up at school dressed in Interview-for-a-job type clothes giving presentations on the…

Tears or lack of

I didn’t believe I had baby blues.  I never cry.  I found a book on depression.  I read the chapter on ‘baby blues,’ I had every symptom except crying.  When I talked to my first counselor, I told him I could count on one hand how many times I had cried in many years.  (I…

Self-regulation

One of my counselors goals was to convince me that I had control over my own life.  I was raised with the ‘you must’, ‘I have to’, ‘I can’t’ and other statements indicating that I was turning my life over to someone else to regulate my behavior.  One time when I stated that “I had…