22 and 46

Trigger warning for those that are distressed by discussion of suicide.  If you are feeling suicidal call the help line

  • Call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline




September 5 to 11 is suicide prevention week.  My opinion is every day is suicide prevent day.  For some of us, it is a daily struggle.  I am thankful to my counselor that understood and found a unique way to help me keep my suicidal thoughts under control until I could handle them in a different way.  Early in my counseling my years of depressing all my emotions erupted.  Suicidal thoughts went from every now and again to daily, hourly, minute by minute.  I ambushed my counselor at his day job.  He was not happy with me.  I wasn’t too thrilled with him either.  I thought counseling would instantly make me feel better, not worse.  My mind was spinning wildly out of control.  I was desperate.  He was creative.  He handed me a small metal nut shell to lock up my suicidal thoughts until the next time I talked to him.  I carried and kept that nutter box for 2 years.  It got me through the emotional roller-coaster of learning how to live with my emotions.  He saw me through the worst.  He nagged, threatened, commanded me not to commit suicide on his watch.  For me, this worked.  Finally, I came to my own decision, “If I commit suicide, my abuser wins.  I will not let him win.  I don’t care if he is already dead….he will not beat me.”

This is a link for 46 more reasons to live:


22 is the number of soldiers that are committing suicide per day.  This does not include the number of people not in the military.  A challenge went out to do 22 pushups every day for 22 days.  Raising awareness. Grasping the numbers.




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