Emotion Regulation is not

Stopping or cutting off emotions.  Dissociation/cutting off emotions is like freezing frogs….as soon as you thaw them they are hopping all over just the same.  Why do I know this?  I used dissociation to obliterate anger and other negative emotions.  Sadly it did the same thing to love and happiness…only the emotions didn’t go away,…

Weaknesses

Can become strengths, but not by themselves. I spent years trying to fix me.  My counselor cautioned me to stop working so hard on my weaknesses every day.  I was puzzled….how could a weakness become a strength if I didn’t work at correcting them.  He was trying to help me see if my only focus…

Took a break

I took a break from my blogs…how do I feel about it?  This is a research/information/encouragement blog.  I keep studying and finding more things to help myself and hopefully others.  It grew well past my original plans.  I discovered in taking a break I did less research.  I didn’t keep up with other people’s blogs…

Attachment Issues

Do people that were abused have attachment issues?  The question really needs a sarcasm font.  The first person that a baby gains attachment to is the first caregiver.  If the caregiver is the one that abuses, neglects and harm that relationship, what does the baby connect to?  Sometimes no one. In the list of best…

Worry is a Bully

Late at night, I know I should be trying to sleep and I am watching a rerun of NCIS.  It is the episode that Gibbs persuades Timothy that after an ordeal he should seek counseling.  The counselor listens to Timothy’s concerns then states, “Worry is a bully.”  It was like a huge light bulb moment. …

Emotional Mindfulness

The title to this article intrigued me: Emotional Mindfulness: What Anger, Vulnerability & Despair Teach Us Emotional Mindfulness: What Anger, Vulnerability & Despair Teach Us I enjoy coming across an article that agrees with me.  I spent a large portion of my life unable to access how I felt.  Through brutal childhood experience I learned to separate…