One of the most insidious and long reaching abuses is often completely ignored or denied.  That is religious abuse. My definition is taking the concept of Heavenly Father, God, and twist it to mean something so horrible that either a person fears God to the point of being unwilling to study the scriptures or pray, worse still refuse to believe that there could possibly be a God that was so punitive and cruel.  Horrible things have and continue to be committed in the name of God.  I experienced this in my life.

Another struggle that may occur are the very obvious contradictions:

Matthew 5:48 Be ye therefore perfect, even as your Father which is in heaven is perfect.

Psalms 51:17 – The sacrifices of God [are] a broken spirit: a broken and a contrite heart, O God, thou wilt not despise.

How can we be broken and perfect at the same time?

The thing I learned about contradictions in religion is people take words out of context or apply today’s understanding to Biblical times.  Our customs are not their customs.

My counselor understood what I experienced.  He encountered religious abuse before.  He encouraged me to talk about my belief in Jesus Christ and God the Father.  When I started learning the difference between facts and opinions, I stated that I believed Heavenly Father is a loving God that sent His Son Jesus Christ to lead us back to Him.  Artist portray Christ as pristine and untouchable.  The Christ I know is a true shepherd and searches for His sheep in the crevices and muddy waters they are stuck in.  He finds them and rescues each one, clean their wounds, binding up the broken places and carrying us back to the fold.  I am a broken spirit, Christ found me and is in the process of perfecting me through His power to heal.  I don’t believe there is a contradiction simply information taken out of context and rearranged.  I believe the deep beauty of Easter Morning – the tomb was empty.  The women saw it and ran to tell the other followers.  They didn’t believe the women and ran to see for themselves.  Each of us can run to see for our selves that Jesus is the Christ the Son sent by our loving Heavenly Father to bind up and heal each broken person one at a time.  Each person can come unto Christ to be healed in their own time and understanding.

My favorite Easter story took on new depth and meaning when I laid an empty egg on my granddaughter’s grave.  I will see her again and experience the joy of watching her grow up.

The Empty Egg

Jeremy was born with a twisted body and a slow mind. At the age of 12, was still in second grade, seemingly unable to learn. His teacher, Doris Miller, often became exasperated with him. He would squirm in his seat, drool, and make grunting noises.

At other times, he spoke clearly and distinctly, as if a spot of light had penetrated the darkness of his brain. Most of the time, however, Jeremy irritated his teacher. One day she called his parents and asked them to come for a consultation. As the Foresters entered the empty classroom, Doris said to them, “Jeremy really belongs in a ‘special’ school. It isn’t fair to him to be with younger children who don’t have learning problems. Why, there is a five-year gap between his age and that of the other students.”

Mrs. Forrester cried softly into a tissue, while her husband spoke. “Miss Miller,” he said, “There is no school of that kind nearby. It would be a terrible shock for Jeremy if we had to take him out of this school. We know he really likes it here.” Doris sat for a long time after they had left, staring at the snow outside the window. Its coldness seemed to seep into her soul. She wanted to sympathize with the Foresters. After all, their only child had a terminal illness. But it wasn’t fair to keep him in her class. She had 18 other youngsters to teach, and Jeremy was a distraction. Furthermore, he would never learn to read and write. Why waste any more time trying? As she pondered the situation, guilt washed over her. Here I am complaining when my problems are nothing compared to that poor family, she thought. Lord, please help me to be more patient with Jeremy. From that day on, she tried hard to ignore Jeremy’s noises and his blank stares.

Then one day, he limped to her desk, dragging his bad leg behind him. “I love you, Miss Miller,” he exclaimed, loud enough for the whole class to hear. The other students snickered, and Doris’ face turned red. She stammered, “Wh-why that’s very nice, Jeremy. N-now please take your seat.”

Spring came, and the children talked excitedly about the coming of Easter. Doris told them the story of Jesus, and then to emphasize the idea of new life springing forth, she gave each of the children a large plastic egg. “Now,” she said to them, “I want you to take this home and bring it back tomorrow with something inside that shows new life. Do you understand?”

“Yes, Miss Miller,” the children responded enthusiastically, all except for Jeremy. He listened intently; his eyes never left her face. He did not even make his usual noises. Had he understood what she had said about Jesus’ death and resurrection? Did he understand the assignment? Perhaps she should call his parents and explain the project to them. That evening, Doris’ kitchen sink stopped up. She called the landlord and waited an hour for him to come by and unclog it. After that, she still had to shop for groceries, iron a blouse, and prepare a vocabulary test for the next day. She completely forgot about phoning Jeremy’s parents.

The next morning, 19 children came to school, laughing and talking as they placed their eggs in the large wicker basket on Miss Miller’s desk.

After they completed their math lesson, it was time to open the eggs. In the first egg, Doris found a flower. “Oh yes, a flower is certainly a sign of new life,” she said. “When plants peek through the ground, we know that spring is here.” A small girl in the first row waved her arm.

“That’s my egg, Miss Miller,” she called out. The next egg contained a plastic butterfly, which looked very real. Doris held it up. “We all know that a caterpillar changes and grows into a beautiful butterfly. Yes, that’s new life, too.” Little Judy smiled proudly and said, “Miss Miller, that one is mine.” Next, Doris found a rock with moss on it. She explained that moss, too, showed life. Billy spoke up from the back of the classroom, “Daddy helped me,” he beamed. Then Doris opened the fourth egg.

She gasped. The egg was empty. Surely it must be Jeremy’s she thought, and of course, he did not understand her instructions. If only she had not forgotten to phone his parents. Because she did not want to embarrass him, she quietly set the egg aside and reached for another. Suddenly, Jeremy spoke up. “Miss Miller, aren’t you going to talk about my egg?” Flustered, Doris replied, “But Jeremy, your egg is empty.” He looked into her eyes and said softly, “Yes, but Jesus’ tomb was empty, too.” Time stopped.

When she could speak again, Doris asked him, “Do you know why the tomb was empty?” “Oh, yes,” Jeremy said, “Jesus was killed and put in there then his Father raised Him up.” The recess bell rang. While the children excitedly ran out to the schoolyard, Doris cried. The cold inside her melted completely away.

Three months later, Jeremy died. Those who paid their respects at the mortuary were surprised to see 19 eggs on top of his casket, all of them empty.

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