Woes of People Pleasing

I’m combining these next two things that I did.  This was a monster hurdle because everyone loves someone that does everything for them, right?  Yup, lots of rewards but sometimes at a terrible cost.  The cost of myself, my relationships, my dreams, my needs didn’t exist. 12. “I feel the need to please everybody I…

Self-abuse

One of the confusing things that my counselor spent many hours trying to help me understand was I needed to fire my mean boss.   That mean boss that expects me to arrive early and leave late.  The one that doesn’t allow any sick time.  Punishes me for not doing enough.  Rages at me for the…

Busy Busy Busy

End of the school year is always hectic and busy.  Big events occur with a few extras thrown in.  Fashion show is this week, culmination of months of work.  Sick teacher had me subbing today…always wearing for me.  Relief of a major burden leaves energy and room in my life for things I love.  I…

What I do struggle with

I thought a lot about what I wrote over the past couple of days.  The articles looking for an easy answer, the one about people oversimplifying problems, and my rant.  I realize that every single abuse survivor walks around with a different set of scars and reactions to the World.  I am making this list…

Self Esteem Challenge

A survivor of child abuse knows that their self esteem bucket had holes punched all over it…Some of their buckets were run over by a semi-truck and trailer.  Some abuse survivors can still hear the ‘beep, beep, beep’ of that truck backing up.  Words like what Pavelka mentions for his toolbox seem like a foreign…

Unproductive Blues

In today’s fast paced World, people treat you like a criminal if you have an unproductive day.  Epitaphs such as lazy, slug, bum, and other cruel name calling come your way.  Here’s the deal, I would love to be productive but my get up and go, got up and went without me.  I remember as…